How did I get here?

Several minutes ago my brain was like a school fight. Not that the two halves of my brain were having a row. That would probably hurt. Of course I’m talking metaphorically here people!

You know how it is. One minute you’re chatting to your friend the next a swarm of running kids congregate out of no-where – a running and half-hearted jogging heard of sheep that nearly knock those new patent shoes off. How is this any relation to my brain?

All these crazed kids are the ideas, thoughts that unfurled around my eyes. A fire that when its centre found was distinguished as soon as I went to type.

So let me claw at those dissipated thoughts. Cut off balloons.

How did I get here?

Not location. I don’t need Google maps. Mainly because I have hardly moved at all. That’s the point!

I finished Sixth Form Woo! Seriously, woo I could not wait to get my little socially anxious mind away from that place. Or jungle – this would be the time where you see that scene from Mean Girls where they all act like animals around a mall fountain aka the water hole. But, that was several months ago, I don’t particularly want to look at the number because it’s seriously depressing.

So this is usually the part where, I would get teary eyed as I said au revoir to the parents and watched them walk away from typically probably 70s dorm room. And complain because my cooking skills go as far as super noodles (not true I love cooking). But, I was always determined not to go down the University route. For me and what I wanted to do, it was too clichéd. If they made an honest sale poster it would say: get wasted all the time, get a degree, end up in a completely different job and don’t forget the big bill we will leave you. It works for some people, but I like to do things differently. **It annoyed me how university was played as the only option. The universities you were applying for a hierarchy that made teacher’s swoon at the student who claimed they were going to the best universities. Other option Apprenticeship, but to strip all the façade basically was suggested if you were ‘less intelligent’. Obviously not true, but those were the connotations.

I’m a firm believer that you can’t teach someone how to write (I’m talking novels etc. not primary school literacy). Why? Because if you asked each novelist how they wrote their book they all would have done it differently. It is finding yourself. That and I also had the banner like dream of wanting to start my own business. This particularly baffled most people, that and the idea of not going to uni.

So, now it’s now. Each day folds into the other like no school days ever did. Regret has me stuck in a revolving door. I am me, but not me.

If society saw me they would say these things that equal failure. You are unemployed. Tragically friendless. You are not at university. You are just doing anything. Mental health issue, what mental health issue? You are perfectly fine, get a job.

This is the part I don’t want to say. It is the thing I want to blip when meeting new people. It’s the lip parting question that has my head hanging between blades. What are you doing? This implies job.

After some convincing I applied for JSA. Job Seekers Allowance naïve as an 18 year old suffering from social anxiety, basically generalised anxiety and as a result depression. But, I think my parents were trying to give me a nudge into life.

DISCLAIMER: This is not one of those weight loss ads that now I’m on this I have lost…duh…duh…duh. So, now you all probably think I’m a Chav that goes to the Jobcentre in tracksuit bottoms and a scrunchie. And that’s exactly what I am talking about. Stereotypes. Not only do I think that it is wrong to brand people in a negative light. Or link a particular image with negative connotations. But, how can I say that to people without being looked down on and the idea of social class rising.

As I sat there with my mum to help me with the nerves. My first interview. The Jobcentre lady talking about all the legalities and pointing at a screen. All I could do was make that face. You know the one. You have to press down your lip to stop the seams on your face puckering. It had been all too much. I could taste the tears in my mouth. I wasn’t doing it for me, for my parents.

Now I was just cast off as a failure of society. Low ranking. My already present shame deepened in my chest and blossomed into thorns that stab at my heart.

For someone who had social anxiety, my signature was signing my life away. Yes, I knew I needed to get a job. Yes, I know it would probably be shit. Yes, I know. Yes, you told me that I can’t just make my living being a writer. Yep, I know I don’t have enough ‘experience’ to run a business.

If you have social anxiety you will know how crippling it felt. I had assigned myself a new cage, and I had turned the key. I was going to have to do things I don’t want to do. Assign for everything and anything. My hell. Social anxiety hell.

To put kindling in the fiery pit. My anxiety was and is building. The house. Same everyday house was now my world. For days, I can’t say specifically when before all this Jobcentre stuff I could feel the sense of doom that accompanies it. My body was being tortured by anxiety symptoms and I felt like I just couldn’t take it anymore. That the anxiety was going to be the end of me (note feeling not suicidal). I needed. I need help. To then be put on a 4 months perhaps more waiting list to get help. Burn baby burn!

12 Common Misconceptions of Anxiety and Mental Health

1. The Fix-it talk

The hey get yourself together, grow up and stop crying and get on with it shebang. Yep you know it, seen it, been in it. Probably have the postcard. Yes the fix-it talk is the steam inducing, heart slopping conversation or rather phrase that sums up the modern view of getting on with it.

It's the whole prit stick routine. Just, sellotape that piece there and stick that back together there. As good as new... oh apart from the sellotape and the dripping glue seeping from all the cracks. Yep it just looks like one of those Harrod's things... can you hear the sarcasm? Its like Woody of Toy Story when his arm got ripped. Or a jigsaw puzzle that's had a few pieces nicked by the dog.

But, seriously people. Even piecing a jigsaw can take time - I'm talking about the ones with the 1000s of pieces here. You need to think where will things fit, where things go. It takes a while before you can really see the big picture.

In these modern fix it or get a new one times. The misconception is that you can snap out of anxiety or depression or other mental health problems, but that is not reality. In fact almost 1 in 5 people feel anxious all of the time or a lot of the time.

2. The you are just's...

You are just... [insert adjective here]shy, pessimistic, sad and the list goes on. 

For anxiety it's that your 'just' anxious or 'just' shy. This misconception I feel just dismisses mental health, because the phrase itself warrants a flippant response that includes some thrown in lazy hand gesture.

I suppose it rubs us up the wrong way, because it lacks empathy or the sympathy we want from others. It almost makes us sound as if our personality asked for a double helping of shyness.

The misconception is because, people themselves may have not felt the same way. I suppose the misconception lies between personality and mental health. If you have social anxiety, doesn't make you shy. It means that you have a fear of social situations. A shy person can be a shy person but not experience the fear and symptoms of social anxiety. They can be accepting of their shyness. If this makes any sense?

3. Mental health is a character flaw, a weakness. And like the thespians we are like to act all dramatic. Just for the sake of it!

Mental health is often depicted as the evil villain with the cape in the wind and all. And like all villains we have a big character flaw. The elephant in the room. The misconception is that mental health is a weakness. The other misconception being that we are faking it.

But neither of those things are true. Mental health is only seen as a weakness, because it is the unknown for people who haven't faced it. Sometimes there is a surrealness to mental health and I think that's what makes others find it hard to believe. Again because it is hushed like a taboo.  

Here is another fact for you: 450 million people worldwide have mental health problems. So, I think it is time we take the taboo wall down!

4. Innocent till proven guilty.

One doozy of a misconception is that people with anxiety or mental health disorders are all violent or have a flashing sign over our heads saying danger, danger.

Quite frankly this is a major over-generalization. Here is for the whhaacha moment... the majority of violent crimes and homicides are committed by people who don't have mental health issues. And sadly people with mental health are more likely to be a victim of violence and are more of a risk to themselves than other. For more stats click here .

5. Somehow that we are chained for life and no-one recovers.

With all the labels knocking about like a ball in a squash court, people presume that no one recovers and are forever chained like a prisoner in a cell to their mental illness. 

Wrong. I'm pretty sure if you Google you will find success stories everywhere. Plus the idea of chains is that you can unlock them. It is the job of finding the right key by trying different ones.

But that is a crappy assumption. I am true believer that there is always light at the end of the tunnel.

6. Sudden inability to work or hold down a job.

Lucky for you, I did my homework. I can prove this wrong in a few seconds, just watch.

4 in 10 employed people experience anxiety about their work and on top of that stat is, about a quarter of the population will experience some kind of mental health problem in the course of a year. Take that. Including that we all know it can take years for people to be diagnosed with a mental health issue. 

Plus desserts, and no I am not having a craving. Stressed backwards is desserts. Stress is related to you mental well-being and a lot of people get stressed at work. But, you wouldn't say they wouldn't be able to hold down a job, right?

Misconceptions shouldn't be prejudiced on a minority or presumptions at the end of the day many of us will work on  and not know we have a mental health issue or don't want to tell everyone about ourselves. The gossips.

7. The sticky stigma that says we ought to be ashamed.

It is said that people who experience anxiety most frequently agree that it is stigmatizing.

This sticky stigma is a web and we are the fly. Mental health is often shhhushed... you can't talk about that. Awkward. It is a taboo, when physical health isn't.

It this secretive atmosphere. Like holding a piece of paper tight to your chest so others don't see. 

We shouldn't be made to bow our heads in shame, if we are innocent. We are not guilty of anything.

There is nothing to be ashamed of. Just be yourself.

8. If I only had a brain... how we are depicted by society as the stumbling Scarecrow from Oz.

If I only had a brain... I would say how stupid this assumption is. No seriously where can I get one?

A common misconception is that people with mental health problems are dysfunctional and do not have control of themselves. Like the singing Scarecrow without a brain we are limited and unknowing of truths.

ErEr Wrong again. This is further from the truth like how far Dorthy is away from home.

9. Where is the love??

Yep I love that Black Eyed Peas song. For me it rings true.

Where is the love? These misconceptions are due to a lack of love or sympathy. No one should be deprived of love! 

After all love is often the solution.

10. You're like Casper the ghost. People see you as unfriendly and aloof.

I'm talking about the movie in the 2000s people. In a way we can all relate to Casper. Yep I know he is not real, but the context is.

People ran away from Casper because of his unfriendly ghost exterior. But, when we got to know him as a character we knew all of that wasn't true. Hence, Casper the friendly ghost.

We are generalised as unfriendly folk, but that's a myth.

11. For teens its all part of puberty.

1 in 10 young people have a mental health problem. So, we may have mood swings and a roller coaster of ups and downs. However, as this statistic demonstrates that it is not all part of puberty.

12. When you get the feeling you are being treated differently.

When I asked people the question of what the common misconceptions are, this came up. Well in more words.

We have all have had that feeling of being treated differently, because of our mental health. Sometimes in not the nicest of ways.

You will agree that everyone deserves kindness, love and empathy. So no-one should be made to feel different for the wrong reasons or in a way where you feel put down. 

Everyone is equal!

Thanks for all the people who made the comments! You helped me write this article. Thank you.

7 Different Types of Anxiety

  These days there is a word for everything. Take erinaceous which means 'like a hedgehog'. Yep congratulations if you got that one, but seriously there is a word for that? Why? Because we humanoids like to define everything otherwise, it is becomes an unknown. And boy are we people screamish of unknowns.

So, that is why for me... Little anxious girl, was somewhat weirdly to say it relieved (lets out breath) when I was told I had social anxiety. This would be when I would use the metaphor it opened my eyes. It seriously did. It made things sort of add up.The anxiety wasn't just a dark googly monster in the corner of my mind. Or this phantom that no-one else thought was real.

I will let you into a secret of what I learnt. You can't just put yourself in one box i.e. for me social anxiety. You might experience a combination of them at some point.

1. Generalized Anxiety Disorder

For short GAD, is the most common type of anxiety. This is when you have been feeling anxious for over a long period of time (for a minimum of 6 months). Often you find it hard to remember when you last felt relaxed. And as a result get mental and physical symptoms such as: irritability, difficulty concentrating, continual worrying, muscle tension, headaches.

Basically if you are feeling constantly anxious, worried or stressed whether be physically or mentally, perhaps both - to the point where it is having an effect on your life you might have GAD.

Please do click on the following websites for some good information on GAD and symptoms:

• Anxiety UK
• NHS

2. Social Anxiety

Social anxiety is often mistaken as shyness - trust me I know. It is also a common anxiety - so you are definitely not alone. It is the fear of people and social situations.

You fear judgement from others. Scared of being rejected or talked about. It is having the fear that somehow you are going to embarrass yourself in front of others. This then has an impact on your everyday life. Perhaps it prevents you from doing things like talking to someone on the phone or going shopping.

Please clicky on the link below to find out more about social anxiety and symptoms:

• NHS

3. Panic Disorder

At some point we all will feel panicked. In fact at least 1 in 10 people have panic attacks now and then. But, panic disorder is the recurrence of panic attacks and about 1 in 50 of us suffer from this. It is no wonder that panic attack after panic attack can leave with this cloud of doom and fear.

 If you think this is you please find more information on the NHS Panic Disorder. 

4.Agoraphobia

According to my anxiety book the term Agoraphobia is Greek for the fear of the market place. Which makes sense when agoraphobia is the fear for busy, claustrophobic and crowded places, right? 

Like most anxieties we are anxious in order to protect ourselves - likewise with agoraphobia. The majority of people who suffer from this at one point from another have experienced a terrifying panic attack that has resulted in you wanting to stay at home - a safe place.

If you want to find expert information on agoraphobia click on the following links...

• NHS Agoraphobia 
• Anxiety UK Agoraphobia

5. Phobias

Undoubtedly we all know what a phobia is. We all usually have one. Of course the usual line up of phobias are: spiders, heights and snakes. Yes those people couldn't last in I'm a Celeb. All it is, is an irrational fear of some thing that can cause a lot of anxiety and panic. 

If  you want to find more about phobias or a phobia you particularly have, you might want to virtual take a ride over to these sites:

• NHS Phobias
• Mind on Phobias
• 10 Common phobias

6. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

I'm pretty sure you have come across the acronym PTSD and this is it. You may know this already but PTSD is cause of an event that has been distressful and traumatic. It is important to remember that PTSD can develop soon after the event, but it can also be years after it.

These events can range from natural disasters to violent attacks to accidents. An occasion that has been fight and flight and truly terrifying. Naturally when events such as this happen in our lives they can have a profound impact on us. For PTSD you may relive this event or become anxious when things remind you of this event 

If you are suffering from the result of a distressing event or want to simply know the symptoms, please take a look at these:

• NHS PTSD
• PTSD Help guide
• Webmd PTSD

7. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

People often associate OCD with this idea of extreme cleanliness. However, this is not always case and disregards the depth of reasoning for each individual.  OCD is when you feel overwhelmed with scary, intrusive thoughts, images or impulses that conclude with the urgent need to perform certain actions to protect yourself.

If you want to learn more about the symptoms of OCD here are some useful links:

• NHS OCD
• OCD UK

If you feel you suffer from any of these anxieties please go and see your GP. Talk to someone. Tell someone you trust. Here are some helpful sites in this particularly baffling time:

Mind

Anxiety UK

NHS

We are the last leaves to fall

Where I am in the world the seasons are stuck between autumn and winter. So, Wutumn. An awkward transition where the weather seems just as confused as we are. It seems even trees experience the same fashion dilemma as to what to wear at this time or rather what leaves to drop. Even TV adverts have got their months muddled up with new Instagram filtered Christmas ads coming too early that for me the truth of it all seems hidden under a pile of Frozen wrapping paper and M&S food.

I have been thinking a lot. Yeh over-thinking is my thing. Of what to write. I have everything and nothing to write about but, I was getting anxious (spoiler there). And as they do all those mean bean thoughts bunched together and formed a mob against me in my mind. Alone I hosted a pity party where I just drowned in these thoughts. Let the guilt build and build to the point when it too became fuel for the nasty negatives.

 So, today I went for a walk. The same usual walk I take. Nothing too adventurous. To what all we humans seek to do: which is to find inspiration. So, as I took my jumpy jumpy dog around a small path, I saw a golden leaf (one of the few left) rocking like a cradle side to side before it hit the ground. You say it's just a leaf. I know and I will get to that in a minute. Something struck me about it but, before I could tap it into my iPhone notes my dog decided it needed the loo. Not the best timing, but still I remembered it. Not that you really wanted to know the whole loo situation of course, sorry!

Well as I looked at this blank screen I began to think. Again with the thinking. We are the last leaves to fall - off the tree. Fall in this metaphor does not mean death, but that does not mean that we can't believe it to be. See it as this instead. We are the leaves on the tree. Use your imagination here (imagining bugs life) - it can be any tree you want as long as it has leaves. Instead of the fall being death think of it as an opportunity. But, with all opportunities there is the unknown. So, we wait watch the other leaves fall before us time and time again. We cling on and on until the tree finally forces us off. What is the moral here? 

Well for me it is this. We who get anxious more than others like not just to wait, but sometimes to hide until it is the inevitable. Where there is no longer a dark corner to sneak into or a door to run out of. We are scared of falling. Likely have visualised all the horrible things, every eventuality other than happy ones like a dramatic film trailer in our heads.  But, what if we didn't consider it as falling but flying. Floating through the air has got to be a metaphor for happiness, right? For that leaf I saw  had a gentle landing.

Perhaps we need to fall in order to pursue are dreams. Although to us fear can mean different things if not an overgeneralised everything. We fear change the most. That is natural. But, we can't control it. Just like how the tree or the leaf has to change with the seasons or adapt with the climate. Like the protagonist in a story there is always a realisation of something. It is time for us to float in the air, after all no-one likes being the last one to fall. It's pretty lonely. Trust me I know.

If you liked today's post or think it might help someone else please give it a sharey. I have a new instagram account which is _hello_anxiety. I will be posting frequent inspirational quotes to get us all in the mood and changing those anxiety driven minds of ours.

Hope your day has been swell and anxiety free. If not so great here is a virtual hug (   ) and well done for getting through it!

On the waiting list for the NHS

You know the feeling. It's the I have waited so long in this queue and then sent to the back feeling. The labelled feeling like the sell-by-date on food.

That's what 'it' makes us feel like. And what is this 'it' exactly? One word NHS. If you have dared to ask the NHS for help - like moi by now you should know how le crape it is. The acronym may as well stand for 'Not Happening Soon', because of the crazy amount of time it takes to be referred. Now I'm not disregarding the good work NHS people do - but seriously the waiting times *Cough government? (By the way I'm on round #2)

Calling the clinic was hard. Why? Because, I got so nervous (as per) that I had to write down what it was I needed to say. Nervous that I could feel my heart picking up and my palms begin to sweat. But, I did it. The reason. I had been screened. Unfortunately not a ticket to the cinema - but of those of you who have gone through the system before will know it is when you lardeedar about 'what's wrong' and fill in the same questionnaire, 1-10s and all that. Which is fine and well and good. But, that must have been over 3 weeks ago and I hadn't heard a peep out of them since. So what were they planning to do with me? They had left me out to dry.

So, I had to call. I want help. So, I did - to then be told to ring another number (which is the worse news for someone with social anxiety!). Eventually I made myself do it. Not only was it annoying to hear clear gossiping in the background (I could hear every word), but that I would have to wait 4 months till I can get therapy. I am on a waiting list, among other people and would have to wait until I get to the top - which let's face it could take longer. It was like I was another body slung onto the heap.

This is not good enough! Not just for me, but for everybody. People can have downward spirals in a matter of hours, days - not months. You will know this. They need help. We need help. When we decide we need help or can get help (which lets face it can be a pretty daunting set of steps) - we do it because we feel as if we need help now. For a lot of people getting help feels like the last resort.

The harsh reality is that people are not getting help quick enough. Like I said it is not necessarily a matter of months, but more hours, days, weeks. I will be able to wait that long. However, I can't say the same for others. What happens if its too long and someone commits sucide, hurts themselves badly or gets themselves in a heap of trouble? Not only does this potentially cost the NHS more? And also the legal system due to consequence - gosh even social services. It has a domino effect. Not to mention the distress of loved ones who may not have even have known someone suffered mentally.

So, even the idea of saving 'money' hasn't fazed the government - the very heart of politics. There needs to be change. Suicide, self-destruction, panic, the feeling of doom can all be prevented with help. It doesn't have to get that far. People shouldn't have to hurt themselves to get attention or to be prioritized (in some cases). You and me shouldn't have to feel insignificant by being added to a 'list' of people and made to feel as if you are competing. Everyone deserves help. You do.

The real 'trew' is that there should be nothing last minute about the mental health system. Everybody should be allowed access if needed. If people were educated about it earlier or if people were offered help earlier it could prevent a lot of occurrences (crime, injuries, loss, waste of money). People should be allowed help on the day no matter how big or small the problem feels like. We all need support at some point.

Together we must take a stand!

Feel the fear and do it anyway

Hello Anxiety,

Today I was... anxious (as if that wasn't obvious). Why? Because for once I didn't say no.

Now usually in my anxietyac ways I would neither say yes or no, sound familiar? I normally can't say no because I feel obligated to say yes. However, I don't say yes either because I want to say no. Do you get me? So, I normally end up beating around the bush and coming out with the same tentative if not repetitive lines like: I can do or perhaps. 

So a few days a go I finally said yes. My dad had booked me onto a soup course (because I've been cookin' up a storm recently), to go to on my billybob. For once I said yes to make myself have to meet and talk to people. But, that wasn't enough to stop the hit of regret or the depression seep under my skin. What had I done?

I couldn't back out now. I had to do it (again I always feel obligated to do things -part of the whole judgement thing I have going on). When I got there. Sat on my own. I honestly felt stupid. Shaky. Judged. I got my mental crystal ball out and started to predict they saw me as this too quiet - awkward girl and I was embarrassed of myself.

Not only this, though today I felt particularly introverted. I had a weird chest which my mind kept on telling me that I was going to get a panic attack and humiliate myself.

Well I survived. Even on small social events an instinct tells us that we won't survive, that we won't be able to cope. Perhaps that is just our fight and flight on overdrive. I stuck at it.

In the end I settled down. I even managed to hold several conversations and became more relaxed as the rest of the course went on. So, what are the two things I have learnt from the experience. One is that you don't have to keep pleasing everyone. For whatever reason with my social anxiety I expect others to expect how you should behave. I have made decisions based on what other people think i.e. holding on when you desperately need the loo (you don't want to be rude) or feeling as if you have to eat everything offered to you even if you don't want it. And the second is that we fear the anticipation more than anything else.

So, that is my anxious story of the day. Hopefully by taking these steps together and challenging ourselves even though our bodies tell us not to - we can get closer to saying goodbye to anxiety once and for all. So my next tip is the quote to feel the fear and do it anyway (all within good reason).

Labels

Hello Anxiety,

Whether they are sellotaped onto a gift, one of those annoying stickers you can't get off a DVD or a pinned name badge, the word label has seemed to have adopted a far more metaphorical meaning. Now you've got people saying I don't want to be labelled as... such and such or talking about how 'labels' are another form of stereotypes.

So, why am I chatting on about labels? Well, I have been thinking (as one often does) about the words or labels people put on anxiety. When you really think about it, and I mean really think about it. The amount of labels it gets are confusing. For once I'm not talking about 'ignorant' views or people who don't have anxiety. Really it is how all of us choose to describe it differently. 

Some will call it an illness. Perhaps a disorder. Maybe even a disease. While others will explain it as something conditioned. An overly anxious person. A trouble. A problem. Generalised anxiety. Social anxiety. Agoraphobia. Depression. Introverted. The thing is we've probably used all if not most of these words to define this nerve jingling thing. But, really what is it? 

It's all a bit mind boggling. If I say is an illness, does it mean I can be 'cured'. Or perhaps I labelled it as a disease, does that mean I believe that there is no hope of getting better that it is simply something I have 'got'. But, somehow being labelled 'overly anxious' doesn't give us that medical jargon that seems to justify us. So, how do we define ourselves?

That just it. Today I can't seem to get my head around it. However, what I can say is this. We weren't born with this extra anxiety. Anxiety has come from experiences and events that have impacted our life in some way. Then they become bigger and bigger until perhaps we can no longer remember the original reason. So, today I don't forgot my book of answers. However, it is definitely something to think about? How do you define or label anxiety?

#Tip 3 Be Harry Potter. Defeat those dementors with positivity.

Hello Anxiety,

Yep that little cloud has caught up with me again. I'm pretty sure that if I let it I would receive a proper drenching. It's days like this when all you want to do is stay in your misery coma (at least that is what it's telling me). There is nothing else my body seems to want to do, but drown in it - bask in array of the poor-me's in the hope that guilt which stirs in my veins will go away.

Here's a metaphor for Harry Potter fans! The lowness is like a dementor which feeds off sadness. In a way it's like the dementor has a grasp of our soul or rather our true selves. And although, Harry was cured by some sweet tasting chocolate which most of the time can help with the blues. A square or two too many can leave us with a guilty food baby or rather ironically back to square one which was feeling low to begin with. That is what JK was getting at. I have heard many a time that dementors were symbolic of depression, and you can definitely see why.

But, chocolate was only a temporary cure like comfort eating or the bad habits we end up in. Bare with I'm not a Potter buff but have watched the movies. How does JK have Harry overcome these demons? With positivity, of course. Now, I know such a word has been used many a patronising time, but it is true. We like the character Harry have to make a decision to either let ourselves be leeched by anxiety and depression or we can realise the power that we have and give them a shove off. At the end of the day Voldemort was really defeated by love. A love that he didn't have. All he had was fear. A power run by fear is know true power at all!

So, how do we stop those dementors or cloaking darkness from attacking us? Well this tip is simple. Though perhaps harder to follow. The sooner you realise that you hold all the cards in your life. No one else. When you look at what you have rather than what you don't (it doesn't matter how big or small it is - as long as it is important to you), be thankful. You are loved. If you don't feel that way then here is a virtual hug (   ) we love you! Remember all those times where you did something you never thought you could. Look back and hold on to that proud feeling. You can do anything. You can achieve anything. Don't think, I am not like that person so I can't become a famous painter or whatever it is you aspire to be. They had their troubles too. You just didn't see it. I'm struggling with writing my book. I can feel crippled with self-doubt. But, I got to keep telling myself I can do it! Keep going. Aspire for what you want to do. 

Those people that you want to be like or have been jealous of or simply inspire you. They were people who felt the fear and did it anyway. Simply they were the ones that didn't give up.

So neither should you. And although, I wasn't expecting to do such a long Harry Potter metaphor. Here it is #Tip 3 Be Harry Potter. Defeat those dementors with positivity.

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